Monday's mail included a check for Jessica, a bill for me, and letters from 10 organizations, thankfully, all without calendars or gifts, asking for donations. Oh, there was one more item, a personal letter to me of four sheets, typed single space front and back, with my name mentioned over and over again. It seems that I have rare but valuable traits although " those around you don't recognize them ." I had to read a paragraph to my wife to let her properly appreciate me. The letter goes, "Roy, please forgive us, but we have just taken a closer look at your profile. It turns out that you're more special than any of us thought..... it turns out that people who possess these same rare and often hidden traits that you do are some of the most famous and most successful people on this planet. Roy, you are indeed blessed."
Such praise goes on page after page. It seems I am destined for wealth (thousands of dollars a week coming in) and for romance and recognition. Whoever these people are, I can only wish they had found me earlier. I would have enjoyed living in a penthouse with a million dollar estate like others this association has found.
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